Tiara Me Sue

As usual, the decision to sit down and write this New Year’s blog came 11 minutes ago at 3:00 pm, on New Year’s Eve Day, three hours before I’m supposed to be at my first New Year’s Eve party in years – which I will have to leave early to be at work four hours into the New Year. Nothing new there, right? But I say that with a smile. Also as usual, thoughts and words played in my head before this decision was made. I suppose it’s because the night that I really consider to be the night of the New Year would be my birthday, my personal New Year – the only one that really matters if I truly believe that everything starts with me – and that wars with the idea of general New Year’s celebrations at the end of December. Somewhat. Not the celebration part – I love to celebrate. The inner ‘battle’, if you will, has to do with the level of expectation that is brought upon people at New Year’s Eve: the midnight kiss, the resolutions, etc. If I fight anything, it is the pervasive and ...

It’s that time of year, the holiday season that begins with the concept of gratitude and ends with a time of giving. (Then, of course, comes the crash after the holidays when real life sets in and winter gets ugly and we’re all miserable again.) (But for now…) Giving is a wonderful thing, and not just in terms of holiday gifts; we have better things to give to others: support, time, attention, appreciation, and love. These are things we give out daily – but only to some degree. How we give out these ‘gifts’ usually depends on how much or little we value the recipient or how much or little we expect in return. That is not something most of us want to think about, or admit publicly; but it is true. We act like we ‘give’ our time to our jobs, but that is a trade and not a gift; we trade time for money. We hold our time as valuable, and mete it out according to what will bring our best benefit – God forbid we waste it on anything or anyone that might not deserve it. We...

It's the thought that counts. That's one of the many things we say that we don't really mean, or don’t understand fully. Most of the time when we say it we are soft-pedaling a disappointment, as in "Oh, well; I tried." The thing is, it is the thought that counts; the problem is we don't really think. It's not just a matter of trying to cheer someone up in some way with a trinket or phrase intended to make them feel better, or giving a gift on a holiday - it's about actually thinking about someone.  It’s not about pondering over someone (I don’t recommend stalking); I’m talking about that random thought you have about someone, whether it's from a memory that was triggered by an event, item, song, smell, sight, or circumstance, or one of those 'nothing' moments when that person just springs to the front of your mind. Acting on that thought, as close to the moment it happens is what makes the thought count. You can have a nice t...

Yesterday I was given a gift - technically, it was a 'hopeful' gift for my daughter; I had mentioned to a friend that I was getting her a record player for Christmas, and he purchased a blind assortment of 70s and 80s rock/pop/funk 45s, hoping I could get at least a couple out of the selection that would be good for her. That was a thoughtful idea, in and of itself. I took the box to work last night, knowing I’d have time to go through them - and it turned into a gift for me. Any time somebody does something for your child, it is something done for you - but what I got out of it had nothing to do with her. I opened the box and spent the next two hours in my own little happy bubble. The first thing I noticed was each record came with a jukebox label stored in the sleeve with it (the way I used to keep them); that’s where the fun started, and it went from there. I grew up with two jukeboxes at home; we had one in the house and one in the large garage out back. My fat...

Six years ago I started doodling as a way to work through grief. I had filled two notebooks with my own ranting and then, surprisingly, ran out of things to say – but I still needed to keep busy. I grabbed a Sharpie marker off of someone’s desk and went from there. I was doodling for a long time. People saw me and started asking me to make doodles for them, to help design tattoos, and even create website logos. Then the ‘adult coloring book’ became popular (I still read that wrong) and someone suggested I try making one of those. My doodling became 'a thing'. I don’t send Christmas cards. That year, I happened to doodle something Christmas-y and on a whim sent out copies of it as a card. Not too many people got one, either. For some reason, my cousin Leona really liked it – I mean, really. And I thought, that’s nice. Until the next year rolled around and she told me she was expecting another. Sheesh. I made one – under duress – and hated how it came out, but s...