IN PASSING
IN PASSING My father and I had different ideas about memorializing our loved ones. Let’s face it; we had different ideas about EVERYTHING. On the anniversaries of the deaths of his parents and those that were special to him/us, my brother and sister and I would receive emails from him with the words “IN LOVING MEMORY OF” and the birth and death dates of our dearly departed. I, on the other hand, could never remember – would never remember the dates of a loved one’s death; I prefer instead to honor the date someone showed up rather than the date they left. I can’t celebrate the day someone leaves, and to me a constant validation of it, while not celebratory , does indeed celebrate it by marking it above all others. The only time I would openly acknowledge – validate – a passing would be the very first anniversary, because the first re-living of a moment is the most potent, and while it’s preferable (and much more beneficial) to relive the happy times, the negative i...