Traffic as a Microcosm

I have friends who regularly say things like, “People suck” and “I hate people” and – unless I’m singing a song from “Scrooge” – you will never hear me say anything like that. Sure, I vent and bitch and whine about people, but overall I believe we are all good. I will go one step further and say that I think the world is a wonderful place.

A ‘fucking cheerleader’ can’t change her pom-poms.

- but she can drop them occasionally.

I sat in some ugly traffic today. Mind you, I drive for a living and I sit in traffic regularly, but today’s commute home was especially ugly. Local peeps know how bad route 24 can get; today, I think it outdid itself.

You all know what it’s like when the traffic is bad, and how some people will go to great lengths to get out of it. They cut people off dangerously, they weave in and out of the lanes, they play ‘bully’ and try to use their vehicle to move others out of their way, they’ll chase emergency vehicles that may have to fight their way through, and they’ll drive on the shoulders or in the breakdown lanes.

We see these tactics on the internet, too; when people think they’re invisible or hidden behind a windshield or computer screen they do things to other people that they wouldn’t do face to face – or at least in full visibility where others can see them.

When people drive so aggressively at the expense of everyone else around them, like everyone else I get angry. Believe me, it’s not uncommon for me to refer to another driver as a ‘fuckhead’ when I see that total disregard for other people in their driving – yes, especially when I’m the one who’s safety is dismissed.

Today, all the road-owners were out in full force; I can’t believe how many near-accidents I witnessed. When the police had to fight their way from behind it became clear that there was an accident further up the road (not surprising).

I started getting angry – actually, I got angry right away, but with all that I was watching around me my anger dissipated and I went straight to discouragement. This was right after the police made their way past, and while one - then two, then three drivers decided that their commute was most important and started driving in the breakdown lane. Being a nation of monkey-see/monkey-doers, everyone else from all three lanes thought that was a good enough idea and began to race over to the right lane (even from the furthest left lanes), pushing and piling on each other (as much as they could) like kids going after the candy when the piñata has busted open. What this did was – duh – block up the breakdown lane and jam up the traffic at the off-ramps while they tried to forcibly squeeze back in lane when the shoulder ended, preventing people from getting off the highway even at their exits. At that point, there was no way a tow truck would get through.

How can we be like that? How is it that we put these ‘Be Kind’ and ‘Co-Exist’ bumper stickers on the very same vehicles we use to bully, harass and endanger others? We are total hypocrites.

And where the hell do we get off blaming all of the world’s ills on society and politics? We are society! We are politics! We are the collective that puts on a face and act that is witnessed, and when we are wearing the masks of the computer screens, phones … cars, we are as unethical and immoral as any hated political candidate - and just as devious, thinking we can get away with it because we can’t be seen. The world’s problems are our own fault, because they start with us and how we act with and towards each other. Co-existing even includes driving together.

I was so disillusioned by the time I made it home. But I'll be ready to pick up my pom-poms again, soon, because I know my belief in people is stronger than a setback. That's what tonight was: a momentary setback designed to remind me of where 'it all' starts. With us. With me. I'll have something to eat, get some sleep, and try to do better tomorrow.

Maybe we all could.

One thing to think about: your children see how you drive. Kids see how people drive. And we raised the monkeys that see and do.  Do you want them copying some of your aggressive and discourteous driving maneuvers at 16, 18, 21 – when they don’t have the ‘recovery’ experience you have as an experienced driver? You do realize those 'fucking kids' drive the way they do because of what we have shown them?

How about practicing what the bumper sticker on your car says - while you are in it?